As part of this awareness process, I'm starting to think about how Friday is going to have it's fair share of pain and discomfort, neither of which I am a huge fan of. It may not even be limited to pain and discomfort - there may even be some parts that are scary. And I am going to have to go quite some time with no food. I hate being hungry. I get very fussy. That's one thing I'm totally going to get when it makes the baby upset. Hungry sucks. I think the combo of being in pain, hungry and scared will definitely bring out my best and most attractive qualities.
Then I realized today at lunch with my team that I have not changed a diaper since high school when I used to babysit. I just asked Brad and he's not that sure he's ever changed a diaper. By Monday when my mom leaves we are going to be completely on our own trying to figure out at 3am why the baby won't quit crying. We are hideously under qualified for this. I have a couple of highly recommended books - that's my only ammo.
Another thing that has me a tad worried is that I haven't heard from my friend who gave birth last Friday. I haven't called or anything not wanting to interrupt or wake someone up - and knowing she will send an email update when she has her wits about her. So far, no wits. She's only been home from the hospital a couple of days, but is it really that nuts for her now?? Why yes, I think it probably is. And this time next week, it will be for me too. For all of us. Try explaining that to a poodle.
So I'm anxious about all these things but then I think about getting to meet the baby and see what he looks like (though I'm fairly certain from the last ultrasound he looks like ME! or at least has my chin) and hold him and I feel so squishy inside. Brad is beside himself he's so excited and seeing him hold the baby for the first time is going to be the ultimate. So as long as I can focus on the good stuff and keep my feet firmly rooted in denial, I think I'll make it at least a bit longer.
My friend Paige and I used to have this running joke whenever someone we knew gave birth that in comparison, we were just not productive at all that day. Sure maybe we finished a presentation or turned in a deliverable, but we did not create life! Friday is going to be so freakin' productive for me.