Sunday, November 16, 2008

Registry Musings

True to a couple of posts ago, I did end up registering this week. For reasons I won't go into, Kristen and I weren't able to go on Tuesday and so I did a bunch of my registering online with my trusty Baby Bargains book while in my PJ's. So I haven't actually set foot in BabysrUs yet. I consider it registry telecommuting! 

I have to say, I would be lost without the Baby Bargains book. I don't know why I believe everything they say, but it is like my woobie; a security blanket in a sea of scary baby items. Much of what I picked was based on that book. Except for the little beanie hat that has 'Rock Star' on it - that was purely self-indulgent. 

Some observations:
  • The entire Fisher Price rain forest collection is highly rated throughout the Baby Bargains book. So why does it have to be so obnoxiously, brightly, cringe-inducingly colored? I have read reviews online by so many parents who tried to buy an aesthetically pleasing swing, high chair, etc. - and all their child wants is the equivalent item in the Fisher Price rain forest line.
  • Brad and I are losers who find a hip stroller completely awesome. It was really the only item I could get him into. I wish I could say we are above all that and totally practical parents with a firm grip on reality, but we are not. Which means our kid will want the Fisher Price rain forest stroller. 
  • Mobiles seem all sweet and innocent until you realize what song you're going to be listening to over and over and over and over and over again. Upon that realization, the cuteness factor becomes secondary to music that won't make you go crazy. 
  • Hands down, the best product name: the My Breast Friend nursing pillow. I've been saying it non-stop because it's so hilarious. Try it in a sentence! Few items screamed out at me as a must-have like that one did. 
  • Right after I caught on that the only reason a particular item cost so much was because it was labeled 'baby', I would find the 'organic' version of the product, which was twice as much. It's the next evolution of guilting soon-to-be parents into 'buying the best for their child'. How can you not go organic?? All those chemicals! Bad Parent! Bad!
Speaking of bad, I did end up finding a completely ridiculous baby offering - not sure if this will end up being the winner of that designation in the end, but it will definitely be in the top 5. The WhyCry Baby Crying Analyzer priced at $99 at Target. It boasts the ability to help new parents distinguish between the 5 types of crying - hungry, bored, tired, stressed and annoyed (seriously? annoyed? like 'i can tell mom and dad just cheaped out on the new diapers and this is SO not working for me' kind of annoyed?).  I don't know who these people think they are, but it is a horribly mean thing to take advantage of sleep deprived, desperate people who want only to make their offspring happy - and charge them a hundred bucks in the process. I hope whoever created it enjoys hell. If Dante was right, they will be on nursery duty.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Babies R Us is worth a visit in person. It is almost like the first time you walked into Sam Moon, but not quite.

Nancy Crain said...

I am not anonymous! I am baby momma's momma.